A BUSINESS PERSON'S GREATEST REWARD by Francis Kong

One night a wife found her husband standing over their newborn baby's crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism.

Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arms around her husband.

"A penny for your thoughts," she whispered in his ear.

"It's amazing!" he replied. "I just can't see how anybody can make a crib like that for only P450.00! (Made in China !)"

It's amazing to see how certain people cannot detach themselves from the business life they live even when they are alone with their family.

Last Saturday was no ordinary Saturday for me.

There was no speaking engagement for me on that day and that is very rare.

Weekends are the first to go in my calendar. Business companies would invite me to do out-of-town talks for their people and schools would invite me to do parenting or faculty development seminars and I enjoy doing it. But last Saturday got me doing something else. I had to do a "superman act." I had to stand as one of the primary sponsors in two weddings that were just two hours apart. And that's not the only
challenge I had. I had to show up in both wedding receptions notwithstanding the fact that one was in the Ortigas area and the other one in Ermita! Somehow God is merciful. Things turned out right. It was stressful but it was fun.

I did it not because I had to do it but because I wanted to. The parents of the newly wed couples are dear friends of mine. Both Romy and Tenny Menorca as well as Guillermo and Rebecca Go are very dear to me.

The two weddings featured a lot of contrasts. One was held in a Catholic church the other one Evangelical. One was heavy in ceremony while the other one was deep in Scriptures. The Menorca 's have wonderful sons (no daughters) while the Co's have wonderful daughters (no sons). One wedding motif required male sponsors to wear the traditional Barong while the other one was strictly coat and tie. You should know that by now, I have developed the wonderful skill of changing clothes inside my car on my way to different functions and occasions.

Now let me tell you what I saw common with the two weddings.

Both weddings were beautiful.

Both wedding receptions were grand and majestic.

You should have seen both the newly-wed couples, they look stunning.

You should have seen the parents, they all looked so proud and happy.

Both weddings packed a lot of joyful tears and merry laughter.

But the one most important common thing I see in both weddings is this: that the kids and their parents are close to each other and they love each other deeply.

Now this is the business person's greatest reward: to have a successful family and to be able to support the children and usher them not just down the aisle but down the path of having their own successful families as well.

So many business people I know are not blessed with this kind of success.

They rush down the aisles of career or business accomplishments and many of them actually achieved their goals only to turn around and see that the roads getting there have been littered with a lot of family casualties along the way. The most tragic moment comes to a person's life when that which one thinks would deliver the ultimate success leads to disappointment and defeat.

You know you're there when this haunting thought nags you: "Is this all there is to it?" But here is how to avoid them:

The warning signs are clear when you hear yourself saying, "But I'm doing this for the family!" You have to stop for a while and seriously ask yourself whether you are indeed doing it for the family or are you doing it for yourself?

Another warning sign is this. You begin to miss your kid's ball games, their recitals, their plays... their birthdays... and you're not interested in attending those corny parenting activities in school.

Now be careful! The "Red Alert Warning"... "Code Red"... comes when you begin to say, "I deserve some happiness of my own...." This is extremely dangerous. This is when stupid decisions are made and you begin to dig a hole that will only get deeper and deeper.

We always pay for the choices we make.

You can fail in your business and you can fail in your career but if you have a successful family then you are still successful.

Take care of your family. Make sure that they are your partners in what you do. Share with them your victories as well as your defeats; your joys as well as your regrets. Be a significant part of their lives and make them conscious of their spiritual walk as well. While I was sitting there listening to the priest and the pastor delivering their message they were both correct when they said, "Unless the Lord builds the house the laborers build in vain."

My last piece of advice is this. Perhaps this is the strongest piece. The best thing you can do for your kids is to love their mother.