THE STARFISH Author Unknown

Once upon a time there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work. One day he was walking along the shore. As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day. So he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down
to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?"

The young man paused, looked up and replied, "Throwing starfish in the ocean."

"I guess I should have asked, why are you throwing starfish in the ocean?"

"The sun is up, and the tide is going out, and if I don't throw them in they'll die."

"But, young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach, and starfish all along it. You can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely. Then bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves and said, "It made a difference for that one."

-- Story based on a poem titled "The Difference He Made" by Randy Poole

BURNED BISCUITS Author Unknown

When I was a little boy, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that biscuit and eat every bite!

When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits. And I'll never forget what he said: "Baby, I love burned biscuits."

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned.. He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired.. And besides - a little burnt biscuit never hurt anyone!"

You know, life is full of imperfect things...... and imperfect people I'm not the best housekeeper or cook. What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

And that's my prayer for you today. That you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and lay them at the feet of God. Because in the end, He's the only One who will be able to give you a relationship where a burnt biscuit isn't a deal-breaker!

A BUSINESS PERSON'S GREATEST REWARD by Francis Kong

One night a wife found her husband standing over their newborn baby's crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism.

Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arms around her husband.

"A penny for your thoughts," she whispered in his ear.

"It's amazing!" he replied. "I just can't see how anybody can make a crib like that for only P450.00! (Made in China !)"

It's amazing to see how certain people cannot detach themselves from the business life they live even when they are alone with their family.

Last Saturday was no ordinary Saturday for me.

There was no speaking engagement for me on that day and that is very rare.

Weekends are the first to go in my calendar. Business companies would invite me to do out-of-town talks for their people and schools would invite me to do parenting or faculty development seminars and I enjoy doing it. But last Saturday got me doing something else. I had to do a "superman act." I had to stand as one of the primary sponsors in two weddings that were just two hours apart. And that's not the only
challenge I had. I had to show up in both wedding receptions notwithstanding the fact that one was in the Ortigas area and the other one in Ermita! Somehow God is merciful. Things turned out right. It was stressful but it was fun.

I did it not because I had to do it but because I wanted to. The parents of the newly wed couples are dear friends of mine. Both Romy and Tenny Menorca as well as Guillermo and Rebecca Go are very dear to me.

The two weddings featured a lot of contrasts. One was held in a Catholic church the other one Evangelical. One was heavy in ceremony while the other one was deep in Scriptures. The Menorca 's have wonderful sons (no daughters) while the Co's have wonderful daughters (no sons). One wedding motif required male sponsors to wear the traditional Barong while the other one was strictly coat and tie. You should know that by now, I have developed the wonderful skill of changing clothes inside my car on my way to different functions and occasions.

Now let me tell you what I saw common with the two weddings.

Both weddings were beautiful.

Both wedding receptions were grand and majestic.

You should have seen both the newly-wed couples, they look stunning.

You should have seen the parents, they all looked so proud and happy.

Both weddings packed a lot of joyful tears and merry laughter.

But the one most important common thing I see in both weddings is this: that the kids and their parents are close to each other and they love each other deeply.

Now this is the business person's greatest reward: to have a successful family and to be able to support the children and usher them not just down the aisle but down the path of having their own successful families as well.

So many business people I know are not blessed with this kind of success.

They rush down the aisles of career or business accomplishments and many of them actually achieved their goals only to turn around and see that the roads getting there have been littered with a lot of family casualties along the way. The most tragic moment comes to a person's life when that which one thinks would deliver the ultimate success leads to disappointment and defeat.

You know you're there when this haunting thought nags you: "Is this all there is to it?" But here is how to avoid them:

The warning signs are clear when you hear yourself saying, "But I'm doing this for the family!" You have to stop for a while and seriously ask yourself whether you are indeed doing it for the family or are you doing it for yourself?

Another warning sign is this. You begin to miss your kid's ball games, their recitals, their plays... their birthdays... and you're not interested in attending those corny parenting activities in school.

Now be careful! The "Red Alert Warning"... "Code Red"... comes when you begin to say, "I deserve some happiness of my own...." This is extremely dangerous. This is when stupid decisions are made and you begin to dig a hole that will only get deeper and deeper.

We always pay for the choices we make.

You can fail in your business and you can fail in your career but if you have a successful family then you are still successful.

Take care of your family. Make sure that they are your partners in what you do. Share with them your victories as well as your defeats; your joys as well as your regrets. Be a significant part of their lives and make them conscious of their spiritual walk as well. While I was sitting there listening to the priest and the pastor delivering their message they were both correct when they said, "Unless the Lord builds the house the laborers build in vain."

My last piece of advice is this. Perhaps this is the strongest piece. The best thing you can do for your kids is to love their mother.

Relationships 101: BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home and committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones and hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Relationships 101: PERSONAL PERCEPTION

Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home,a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"

Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman." The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders.

It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear.

Relationships 101: RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other,we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted,"Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.

Relationships 101: NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another,or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations.

Relationships 101: CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."

The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please."

"Oh, good looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.

Relationships 101: NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"

The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.

Relationships 101: TRUST

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A female telephone operator received a phone call one day. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".